No hitter? – It’s nothing til I calls em

What is the difference between a materialist, an idealist, and an existentialist umpire?

A materialist says: I calls them as I seems them.

An idealist says: I calls them as they are.

An existentialist says: They ain’t nothing, ’til I calls them.


Instant replay diminishes the game.

http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/04/sports/baseball/04tigers.html?hp